Wednesday, February 27, 2019

Pierwalker Log: February 27, 2019

Writing start: 10:28 A.M.
Finish: 3:30 P.M.
Total new words (est.): 1000
Edited (est.): 1700 + 6 poems
Tasks

1. Failure: 500 new words
Notes: Chapter twenty-four is finished! On to the primary edits!

2. Book Three Melody: 300 new words
Notes:Very slow-going. Plot-points from five books are converging here.

3. Ant Story: Off

4. Fractalverse V5: Third tertiary edit of the sixth set of six poems

5Rapscallion: Read-through of chapter four
Notes: I'm going to give it all another read-through (at least) before proceeding.

6. LOTR: Off

7. Angel: Book Three: 200 new words
Notes: The prologue is finished! I'll put some serious work on it during its primary edits to make sure it's seaworthy for what's to follow.

8. T-Bag: Off

Special Projects:  None today

Extra notes: I've got a new term for you all. Is everyone paying attention? All eyes on me? No talking in the back, please. I'll write it on the board--here it is:

Amatonormativity

What does it mean? I'll let Elizabeth Brake, who coined the term, explain. Here we go:

The belief that marriage and companionate romantic love have special value leads to overlooking the value of other caring relationships. I call this disproportionate focus on marital and amorous love relationships as special sites of value, and the assumption that romantic love is a universal goal, ‘amatonormativity’: This consists in the assumptions that a central, exclusive, amorous relationship is normal for humans, in that it is a universally shared goal, and that such a relationship is normative, in that it should be aimed at in preference to other relationship types. The assumption that valuable relationships must be marital or amorous devalues friendships and other caring relationships, as recent manifestos by urban tribalists, quirkyalones, polyamorists, and asexuals have insisted. Amatonormativity prompts the sacrifice of other relationships to romantic love and marriage and relegates friendship and solitudinousness to cultural invisibility.

I have brought this new term up because when such a term is first coined, one that has a direct and profound effect on one's life, as this one has had on mine, it's important to remember it.

My life has been a very lonesome affair, for the most part, precisely because of this cultural phenomenon--amatonormativity. It is a suburban norm and a suburban value, in fact, to adopt it without even thinking about it. And it is a deeply cruel, and indeed immoral, way to treat others who are not part of one's marital or amorous relationships. As I have been--many, many times.

Indeed, I lost every relationship I ever valued back in Colorado directly or virtually directly because people who I thought were my friends were, in fact, just using me until they could establish and cement (usually through marriage) a "marital or amorous love relationship." When that happened, I was kicked to the curb--every single time.

It is powerfully refreshing to see that I am not alone in this treatment--so much so, in fact, that someone went out of her way to coin a term that defines such monstrous behavior.

Thank you, Ms. Brake.

I'm sure I'll be writing about this more in future posts. That term--its meaning, its implications, its pervasiveness, and those who rebel against them--inform an enormous amount of my writing, especially Melody.


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