Friday, February 8, 2019

This Is Where I Will Go

There is a universe of awesome out there.
That's where I've tried to go every day for the past fifteen years.

When I look upon the state of the world
and the middle-school-stunted human species destroying it,
there is where I go.
There is where I escape.

To the six of you who regularly visit this blog,
let me thank you.
I appreciate your readership and attention.
You could be doing a million other things than coming here.
That's meaningful to me,
and I'm very grateful to you.

I have loped through this tangle called life almost entirely alone.
The friends I thought I had I didn't.
They were frauds and betrayers.
Others have acted like friends,
but then read one of my novels,
or perhaps an essay or two,
and, with great cowardice,
simply disappeared, no warning, no words, nothing.
I never heard from them again.


I've got a loving partner now;
she's been with me the past decade.
She loves the universe of awesome that I've mapped.
We visit it together many times.
Through good times and bad,
she has stuck with me.
She has more courage and decency in her pinkie finger
than the lot of the abandoners mentioned above.

There is no way to exist consciously in this modern world
without living in a constant state of outrage and existential isolation.
It's an easy litmus test of character.
I'm not interested in interacting with those wearing blinkers.
The world is burning.
Blinkers are immoral.
It's as simple as that.

And so here I am.
Some shopping, a movie, then dinner.
A nice drive both ways.
I'll return and log on and see that no one has read this post.
Maybe a bot or two from the Ukraine or Turkmenistan.

Outrage. Isolation.

But there is that awesome universe out there,
beyond here.
So that is where I'll go.


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